The Power of Slowing Down

I recently threw a question up on Instagram stories, asking what topics you'd like me to dive into. Guess what topped the charts? The art of slowing down. Now, we've all nodded along to the advice about the benefits of slowing down, but how on Earth do we actually pull this off in our daily whirlwind? Here's the truth, even as a nervous system coach, I grapple with this daily. In the midst of my own postpartum healing journey, I've been doing some serious contemplation and experimentation in the realm of slowing down. I don't have all the answers neatly tied up with a bow, but I've got some thoughts and practices to share on the art of hitting pause.

BRAIN SCIENCE:

Lets start with a little brain science 101! 🧠 Imagine this magical space inside where everything is just right—sensory input is on point, the environment is a perfect match for your preferences, and you're gracefully riding the rollercoaster of life without teetering over the edge. Now, what's this edge, you ask? It's the more extreme zones of our nervous system, the ones that trigger fight, flight, freeze, or even shutdown responses. These extreme states are important when it comes to survival, but our modern lives are intense, and we often find ourselves stuck on the edges of our nervous systems capacity.

These intense states become our "normal," and that's where the trouble brews. Operating at these extremes puts colossal pressure on our bodies, brains, and souls. Sure, there's a time and place for fight or flight, but when it becomes a daily affair, we're essentially signing up for a stress-induced marathon. This is why I am so passionate about the art of slowing down.

But, making the shift from super stressed to super slowed down is not as easy as flipping a switch. It's like trying to switch gears from a Formula 1 race to a Sunday stroll—it takes time, patience, and a whole lot of intention. It can be really frustrating when you physically can’t switch these gears, even though you want to. We've heard about the wonders of meditation and mindfulness, right? However, when you're drowning in stress, sometimes they feel like a distant oasis. The gap between knowing they're good for you and actually feeling "relaxed enough" to dive in can be a real struggle. This is because you are bridging a huge gap from the extremes of what your brain and body can do to a more neutral place.

There are tips and tricks scattered across blogs and Instagram for nervous system regulation and these can be great starting points, like little breadcrumbs leading to calm. BUT personalized, one-on-one nervous system coaching takes the cake. Why? Because it's tailor-made for you—it's the GPS guiding you through the twists and turns of how YOUR system works. And trust me, that personalized touch is the secret sauce that makes all the difference.

Below is a glimpse into what has been working for me in the realm of slowing down. I think it could be useful to others, but remember this is tailored made to MY system.

MOVEMENT & PLAY

My go-to mood lifter is movement. It’s my personal lifehack for staying sane. When I infuse the right levels of proprioceptive and vestibular input (for me), my entire system finds its bliss, allowing me to genuinely embrace a slower pace.

Discovering the power of just 15 minutes of deliberate, unhurried movement has become my secret elixir, resetting the rhythm of my internal pacemaker and providing a guiding cadence for the day. This intentional movement manifests in various forms—gentle strolls at a leisurely pace, cautious forays into the realm of Pilates, somatic exercises performed with utmost delicacy, or a simple stretching routine before bedtime. But, and it's a big but, there's this constant tug-of-war within to go faster and do more. The whole "bounce back, lose the baby weight" mantra creeps in, and I've got to be the referee.

As I rewire this nervous system of mine, I'm essentially creating a cozy pace—a safe zone, even if it feels a bit alien. The more time I spend in this slowed down zone, the more familiar it becomes to my nervous system. This makes it easier to call up in moments of stress.

Now, the sweet spot between slow-mo and fast-forward? Playtime. Engaging in playful moments with my children, whether in the backyard or the basement, serves as a gentle activator for my nervous system without the weight of adult responsibilities. It is how I train my brain to be doing but not rushing and racing. I think this would be a beautiful practice to do with a pet as well.

HABIT STACKING:

Let's talk about the art of habit stacking to weave moments of slowing down into our daily rhythm. I'm a fan of tucking these gentle reminders amidst the things I'm already doing. Take, for instance, my morning coffee routine—I sprinkle a dash of pumpkin spice, take that first sip, and there it is, my cue to slow down and savor the moment. Even during meals, I pay attention to the pace of my chewing, a simple reminder that there's no need to rush.

Diaper changes? That's another one. I steal a mere two seconds to ground myself—feel my feet firmly on the floor, a gentle nudge to acknowledge that I am safe and supported. It's these little pockets of the day, seamlessly integrated into existing activities, that become my checkpoints for slowing down.

PATTERNS

Much like many others, I've noticed my natural inclination to speed through life, often existing in a perpetual state of stress. Interestingly, I've observed instances where I unconsciously create scenarios that perpetuate this fast-paced existence. Take the simple act of leaving the house, for instance. Mornings are particularly hectic with the kids, and some stressors are beyond my control. However, I've come to realize that setting my alarm a bit earlier could provide the breathing room needed to navigate these moments more deliberately. Strangely, even when I acknowledge this, I don't always implement it. The same pattern repeats itself in the afternoons—I find myself intentionally waiting until the eleventh hour, almost relishing the opportunity to whirl around in a rush. It's not about self-blame but rather recognizing how my thought processes influence my actions, and how these actions tend to align with stress. Instead of dwelling on it, I've adopted a more light-hearted approach. I notice the pattern, share a little chuckle with myself, and consciously inject moments of slowness into these seemingly rushed situations.

In the realm of brain science, the more we engage in a deliberate practice of slowness, the more our neural pathways adapt to this unhurried rhythm. Picture it as if the express lane for speed and stress in our brain is well-maintained and open, while the pathways for slowing down are obstructed by cobwebs and barricades. Every time you consciously shift from a fast pace to a slower one, it's akin to clearing out those mental roadblocks. As these pathways become clearer, navigating them becomes increasingly effortless. It's crucial to understand that struggling with slowing down doesn't make you morally flawed or a terrible person; it simply means you need to initiate a rewiring process in your brain. With consistent effort, slowing down will gradually become a more natural and accessible state.